Are my tears enough
Do their salty waters nourish anything
Is my heartbreak even relevant
When bodies disappear and bullets shred
Does tenderness hold up to tyranny
As masked and unmasked men seek to grind us under tightly laced boots
Is there anything to gain from the rage
The despair
What keeps the night riders away
I don't have the answer
But I will not let them win
I will not sacrifice the beauty of this life
The wonder of this life
On the altar of war
I will not put down my heart
To pick up the gun
I have to find another way
Different from what I've been taught
By patriots and revolutionaries alike
Instead
I will listen to the fall of snow
The soaring of the hawk
The growth of the pine and the oak
I will feel the sun and moon and stars on my face
I will sing with the ocean
The sand
The stone
I will taste love
And laughter
And tears
And I will smell hope
And kindness
And the wonder of it all
I will look into the hearts of my armored brothers
Seeing their humanity, fear, confusion
And yearnings
I will stay here, through it all
Weeping, raging, listening, feeling, singing, tasting, smelling, seeing, yearning
Here, through it all